A pit bull.
That joke is compliments of Kinky Friedman, one of my favorite authors. I just finished his book, "Elvis, Jesus & Coca Cola." It met two of my most important requirements: funny and entertaining.
As well as solving a complicated murder mystery, he made keen observations about his cat. His cat sounded like an a-hole. It reminded me a lot of my cat. One of his observations was that you can tell how cold it is outside by how tightly a cat rolls up when they're lounging. If most of their belly is exposed, it's not cold at all. If they're rolled up tight into a ball, don't even bother going outside. It'll be like the North Pole.
There are winter storm warnings where I live. And this is going on in my house:
I wonder what Kinky Friedman would say about this as it pertains to the weather...
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